Can you make yourself more attractive? Can you stop attracting the wrong ones? All this and more after the jump where I tackle Six FAQs on Attraction:
1. Can I attract the type I’m interested in if I don’t fit that type?
Absolutely! You definitely CAN attract a certain type if you aren’t necessarily that type. CAVEAT: It will likely be harder for you to do so. You know how they say dress for the job you want, well the same advice sort of applies to dating. Dress for the person you want.
2. I keep attracting people who are bad for me. How can I change it?
Some aspects of attraction are out of your hands. Whatever your personality type, you’re likely to attract the same type of personality. It’s hard to change your personality so there isn’t a lot you can control in who you attract. What you can change is who you date. You can attract 99 assholes for every 1 nice person, just make sure you date the nice person.
3. I keep being told that the people I’m interested in aren’t physically attracted to me. What can I do?
Two ways to approach this: You can decide that you are unhappy with how you physically look because you aren’t physically attractive to your recent potential partners and dedicate yourself to making changes. Alternatively, you can learn to love and accept yourself and wait for someone to come along who is attracted to you on every level. There is no right answer here.
4. How can I attract more people?
Be on your B.E.S.T. behavior (Body Language that is positive, Eye Contact that is sustained, Smiling, Talking). Don’t shy away from conversations or eye contact. Maintain a bearing that displays confidence (even if you’re faking it). If you’re not currently doing any of that, work on those things to become instantly more attractive
5. How can I quickly make myself more attractive?
All the above PLUS this one thing that people tend to not do: Work on your posture. Seriously, I’m not kidding. Improving your posture and standing up straight makes you more attractive and actually can change how you feel about yourself. Also, if someone has a similar posture to you, you’ll find them more attractive. Stand up straight and you’re going to quickly become more attractive.
6. How can I make myself more attractive in the long-term?
Work on becoming a more diverse person. If you can be described in one sentence, you’re likely limiting how attractive you can be. You don’t need to fake being something you’re not, but working genuinely on becoming a more diverse person int he long-term will make you more attractive. A man or woman who can discuss current events, pop culture, sports, and travel in addition to their hobbies or their occupation is going to be more interesting and attractive than the person who only talks about their job. Do it naturally, build up your diversity over time, and you will be more and more attractive with each new bit of knowledge and experience.
Good Luck Out There.
photo credit: Maria Georgieva (Mimoza291)